SPEAKER_00 0:00

You have to have some semblance and level of consistency in your week and time still set aside for the important things in your life so that you can still stay grounded as a human being.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

Everyone wants to build something meaningful. Everyone, what do you feel like you had to give up to build what you've built? Welcome back to Beyond Adjustments. I'm Amin Said, and this is part two with my conversation with Dr. Marisa. In part one, we talked about her Achilles injury, what it exposed in her business, how her team stepped up and the hard leadership lessons that came with realizing delegation is not just giving someone a task, it's actually trusting them with it. Which, let's be honest, is where a lot of us business owners start sweating. I'm not sweating, you're sweating. In part two, we shift into Heart Work Podcast. It's the podcast Dr. Marisa has with Dr. Sarah. You'll learn more about it in a second. We talk about identity, self-work, purpose, and what it really costs to build something meaningful. And I love this part of the conversation because it was not polished, it was not fluffy, it was not one of those kind of just follow your dreams moments where everyone pretends they don't always have bills, fear, burnout, and black messages waiting for them. Dr. Marisa gets honest about stepping into her own voice, uh, no longer tricking herself to be uh received well, and learning that growth does not always mean doing more. Sometimes it means becoming more aligned, more clear, more willing to be seen. Yeah. Alright, I'm I'm done talking. I know you guys want to hear the episode, but before we do that, quick shout out. Clearcut podcasting. Couldn't do it without you guys. Uh they kind of keep this whole thing together and making sure the episode looks and sounds professional. Because without them, this would just be me, a microphone, and a dream held together by caffeine. Ah, let's jump into part two with Dr. Marisa. I want to talk about heartwork for a minute. Not kind of from the angle of why you started it, because I again we we kind of covered all that, uh, but what it's actually done to you, for you, around you, right? Has having those kinds of open conversations changed how you show up in your practice? And we kind of touched on that a little bit, but how do how do you or can you tie it back to what you're doing in that kind of in that uh um what do you whatever you want to call it, uh vertical in your life?

SPEAKER_00 2:57

Yeah. This is an incredibly timely conversation because Sarah and I have really continued to evaluate like what heartwork is. And when we did start it, we wanted an opportunity to give a space for other leaders that run their businesses and our entrepreneurs to be able to have the raw, honest conversations and to be able to have the opportunity to do the inner work, to understand that their own wounds, triggers, our identities are all gonna contribute to how we show up, not only as a person, but as a leader in a business. And in like how that is gonna influence the people working with you as well. And so as she and I have continued to navigate those conversations, I think too, we have both really changed, especially for me and everything I've learned over the last eight months, because heartwork has been around since the end of 2024. Um, just even these past six, eight months, like I've really stepped into my own level and understanding of what it is that I actually contribute. Because for a long time in my life, I've always felt like a supporting actor in a way. Um, never truly the lead. And I really embodied that with team sports, I embodied that with um partnerships, I embodied that with relationships, I embodied that with pretty much so much, thinking that my job and my best thriving was helping others live out their dreams. And that is true. I have a gift in being able to help activate other human beings to live the life that they want. And then I have a gift of reflecting the mirror to see where the blockage is from being able to fully express that and really activate the fire in your soul to go after what it is that makes you happy and your biggest passions and purpose in life. At the same time, heartwork became almost a container where we really dove into specifically talking about leadership and teams. But, or rather, not but I really try to eliminate butt from my vocabulary. And at the same time, heartwork really does live and breathe in every aspect of your life. And doing events with Sarah and navigating that partnership together in person, I noticed that for a lot of time I would still almost like, you know, intern to mentor, take kind of a backseat and not really know what it was that I was bringing to the table. And so I would sit and kind of stay in a shadow a little bit and try to always kind of look to that person for affirmation and for worth of what I was saying, contributing was actually impactful and meaningful compared to just owning my voice and owning my persona. And so this most recent event that we had from the own work that I have continued to do personally, um, and also the less filtering that I have done on myself and the more ownership I have taken over my um truly, it feels like the Italian culture side of my being, and the more sensory side of my being, and the desire to experience life through everything, through smell, through taste, through touch, through sight, through hearing, and just the more fluid, almost like feminine side of my expression compared to the masculine doing productivity, et cetera side. Um, it's just funny to say that because so much of my life I have lived to try and move away from that like go, go, go. And remember, we're not human doings, we're human beings. But every time that you go through something else in your life and you navigate that life happening for you, you reach those woundings and those identities at like a new depth, at a new level. And so even though I had processed that and I, you know, I moved across the country. And like you said, people can go back and listen to my story. It's like in this phase, as I was navigating a new business and teaching other people about leadership and identity work and the inner process, I was like, oh no, there's a layer there that still needs to happen for me. There's a there's a part of me that is still being, you know, held aside or in the shadow for fear of being seen in that way and fear of being judged in that way. If I showed up with that authentic fire that I have versus trying to show up polished in the way that I think others need to receive me in order for me to make an impact, versus just knowing that my presence and my gift as an individual is what helps me make an impact with the people that resonate and need to receive and hear it exactly in my tone, exactly the way that I show up to feel activated in that way. You know, we are all beautiful individual human beings that all have different gifts. And someone's gonna receive something from me in a way that they may not receive it from Sarah, and vice versa. And just being more confident and more bold and owning that has really shifted me and has really opened me up. And I have, again, like even in the way that I've led my team and just this past week, even I created more boundaries around my time. I'm taking CEO mornings on Thursday mornings. I trust that they are gonna be able to handle it and rock it. It's something I've talked about for a year, but I've continued to not do. Again, thinking that I needed to be present in the practice for things, but it's extremely distracting for me to be able to work on the business while I'm in the business. You know what I'm talking about. And um just even in what I have to offer. And so, heartwork, even Sarah and I continue to evaluate heartwork being this space where she and I can share vulnerably. But perhaps it's not something that we are meant to do together all the time and bring people in, but allow it to be a container that holds space for these two beautifully independent women that then also have their own offers in these different arenas and spaces based off of what people need in different times and seasons of their life. And so there's been a lot of growth and a lot of change and evolution and navigating, doing your own heartwork and letting that influence how you show up and what you create in the world in other aspects of your life.

SPEAKER_01 9:32

So I have a question here. So would you say that? So, first of all, I I want to speak to everybody that feels like they're faking it till they make it. That's a real feeling. Um was that a piece of it for you? That's one. Do you feel that? Do you do you kind of does that something that you have to kind of push down sometimes? But the the bigger question here is because you are in it, because you are running hard work, because you were doing research on what you were supposed to be speaking about and so on, because of the things that you said, the things that you explored on the podcast, right? Do you feel like that that is what kind of pushed you a little bit outside of your comfort zone to get you to what you're saying right now?

SPEAKER_00 10:20

100%. And to answer your first question, I don't believe it was fake it till you make it. It was like reserve yourself until it's received well. And it was like, what's the way that's gonna land for others? And so, what kind of aspect of myself can I showcase that's gonna land with that person in front of me? But what actually I needed to do was stop worrying so much about how I was meant to be received and worry about sharing from me as a full, as the full essence and full person that I am versus piecemealing it to fit in a box or a package that I thought would be received the best because what has happening was that it wasn't being received at all. Well, that was because it was only a fraction of my fullest expression. And then absolutely, I don't, I think if we just go through our lives in the day to day and don't ask ourselves those questions, don't give space to have these conversations, don't allow for reflection, don't allow for people that you trust to speak into you and to help you see those things that sometimes are blind spots in our hearts and in our being, that you may miss that. And that's where I think people get down in their lives further down the road and they're like, How the heck did I get here?

unknown 11:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:38

So for me, when I kind of looked around, uh, when I looked at the people around me, they were in that same mindset. There was no um, at least when when we had those conversations, and I found out, like, oh, they they feel the same way, right? It didn't matter how much experience I brought to the table. I mean, I've been in technology for how long? Like, I don't even want to tell you how long, okay? If you know what ATDT is, that's how long I've been in technology, okay? So we'll just leave it at that. But that said, I bring way more to the table than I give myself credit for. And I think a lot of us, and a lot of people under the sound of my voice right now are feeling that. And it's a lie because we all bring a level of experience to the table, whether it's here or whether it's here or whether it's here, it's value added to the conversation. And that's why I kind of always went back to that feeling of I'm faking it till I make it. I was, I was at one point, um, you know, in in in the middle of a trade floor in Charlotte, right? Part of my job was to ensure that they didn't lose millions of dollars, right? So I can I can bring that to the table, right? But I still felt like, am I really like how much value am I really adding to this situation? And so, so I get what you're saying. I get the whole being reserved because you're not sure how it's gonna be received. I think for me, it's being reserved because I didn't feel like the person in front of me thought I brought that much value to the table, period. So um, I think I think I I looked at it both ways, but that's definitely a good point. So I appreciate you uh honing that in. But yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:29

It's uh it's um it all comes down to that self-worth. I think we all naturally come to the table. I mean, you get in the rooms with people that have, you know, seemingly everything, right? They have booming businesses worth billions with a capital B, and they still go into a new room being like, am I, do I deserve to be here? And it's one of the conversations that I think is actually coming to the table more, which I I love and I think it's a wonderful opportunity because yes. And also it's okay to say I'm gonna make my seat. And I think it's okay to say I do want to like, not I wanna fake it till I make it when I'm in there, but to have be like, I don't know that I have the evidence of confidence, but I do know that there's something that actually like called me into this space, and I'm gonna allow myself to be open to receiving it. Because if we are very conservative, or if we are concerned rather, with what that is, you may actually be holding back even more of your gifts that are literally being asked to be shared in that moment.

SPEAKER_01 14:33

Yeah. I think that kind of brings me also back to the that leadership quality because it bleeds into that, especially when you have a team that you're trying to lead, because you see it in them. You're like, we talked about this. Like, stop, you know, putting yourself in this bubble, stop kind of bringing yourself down. Like, there's way more self-worth that you need to be giving yourself in this situation. Like you bring way much, you know, way more to the table than you're actually giving yourself credit for. Or I'll I'll bring my kids up again, right? My daughter, she's in track. She's a tiny little girl. Oh my god, she's the princess, my little tiny, yeah. But I'm telling you, grit, she's she's got it. She's not the best runner, she's not the fastest runner, but she you can see it. Like you could see the drive, you could see the push, and she gives herself such a hard time. And I always have this conversation with her. I'm like, sweetheart, look at where you were two years ago and look at where you are now. Oh, I did that, and now I'm doing this, and I wouldn't have been able to do this unless I did that and walked through that. So, like, it's a it's a matter of perspective as well. So, yeah, very again, I do it to myself all the time when I talk to you. We can go into these kind of conversations and go in for hours, but I do need to segue just a little bit here because I think this is one of the most important parts of the conversation. All right, quick pause because apparently this podcast still has bills. Uh rude, but true. Uh, this part of the conversation is all about purpose, capacity, and building something meaningful without losing yourself in the process. And that connects directly. I know it sounds weird, but it connects directly to AI Local Boost because if you're a business owner, especially in healthcare, you already have enough on your plate. You're serving people, managing your team, handling operations, trying to lead well, and maybe occasionally remembering to eat lunch like a functioning adult. The last thing you need is another marketing task staring at you from across the room. AI Local Boost helps take one major thing off your plate by keeping your Google business profile active and optimized. Posts, updates, review activity, photos, visibility signals, all the things that help your business show up where people are already searching. It's built for the business owner who knows local visibility matters, but does not have time to babysit Google every week. Because again, most businesses don't struggle because they don't know enough. They're buried under too much information and not enough execution. Alright, back to the episode with Dr. Marisa. There's more guys, much more. Everyone wants to build something meaningful. Everyone. I don't care if you're five years old and trying to prove yourself or you're my age, which you can go figure out how old I am because it's all over the internet. But because I mean, honestly, everyone wants to build something meaningful, but but nobody really talks about kind of what it costs. So I'm gonna drop this question on you and in as real a voice as possible. I want to just kind of give it to us. But what do you feel? Like what do you feel like you have to give up to build what you've built?

SPEAKER_00 18:11

Everything. I mean there are seasons of building a business, and if you truly care to help it grow and cultivate it, you give everything, you may not give everything all at once. And I try not to think about it as a cost, but again, as an investment, but it takes from you. Um, you know, I I haven't had children yet, but in the same way that you give all of yourself to them, and especially as a woman, like we give of our bodies, we give of our heart, our soul, our mind, like everything to this little human to help them go out into the world and do the best that they can. And we do the best that we can, and we make mistakes along the way, and we make decisions that maybe we wish we didn't, and have, you know, life that happens into them, and we can't protect them from everything. Like, same with business. There are things that are so out of your control in the economic climate, socioeconomic faculties. There may be flooding and weather that happens with your business and life and who comes in it or who gets angry one day and who isn't. And if you have teams, you've got people around you with it. I mean, there's so many variables to it. But in the beginning, you may give all of your time, you may give up your money, you may give of your sleep, right? And then you may find like, okay, all that effort has produced opportunity. Now you get to hire people. Well, now you have to give up your emotional capacity. You have to give up yourself and train yourself and grow into a leader that can hold that space and hold account and lead them to lead themselves, to lead, if especially if you're in service, their client, or to lead a level of their own self-excellence to help maintain product quality, for example. And then you may come to a time where you do want to grow, but now you have more people and now you have other things. So it costs of your control, it costs you your, you know, delegation and feeling like, am I still worthy? Because I may not be doing all of the things that I did before because I'm being called to step into doing the things that will help this business continue to make the impact I want it to make. And you may cost your relationship. I mean, it may cost different things at different times. I mean, there were times where I wouldn't come home until 10 o'clock at night. And like my husband and I, we would have date nights on, you know, Friday nights because it was like we knew during the week if I was anywhere, I was gonna be there. And there may be times where he has to get up for a labor job in the morning and be at work sometimes at 6 or 7 a.m. Well, I'm over here sleeping because I go home at 10:30 and I go into the office at, you know, 8:30, and then he's home at four or six, and I'm not home till nine or 10. So, like there may be again different seasons of time, but if you're building something and you know what you're building it for, and if you remain connected to that purpose and that why, and the people that are around you love you and know that too, and you continue to involve them in that connected communication, I think that you can then navigate those seasons with a lot more grace and ease, right? Like it may not always look the same, but there's a purpose to what you're building and a purpose to what you're doing, and you keep that dream and vision at the forefront while also, while also remaining connected to knowing that your capacity is going to directly influence your business's growth. So if you are constantly, never endingly giving to your business without taking a moment to pour back into yourself. This could look like a quarterly vacation. I'm not saying that every single night you have to gouache on, do self-care. I'm not saying that every day you're gonna feel like working out, but you have to have some semblance and level of consistency in your week and time still set aside for the important things in your life, one for yourself and two for the relationships that matter the most for you, so that you can still stay grounded as a human being, as you're building and as gosh, it it does take from you, but the fruit and the intention is that it also gives back to you as well.

SPEAKER_01 22:35

I'm I'm 110% guilty of not doing that. So I think I needed to hear that. But that said, I can literally sit here and talk to you all day. But um, as we kind of wind down the show here, I want to close it out a little bit differently. No polished answers. No, this is what I should say, all right? Because I think you've we're we're past that. Um but just the f I'm gonna say a few things here, and I want you to tell me the first thing that comes to your mind. And I'm not asking for one-word answers. I want you to just be honest, just literally, if you gotta throw up on me, throw up on me. I don't care. Um I won't catch you like your husband did, but I'm not there to do that. But no, seriously, like I I want you to think about the so the first thing that comes to your mind after I say these things, I'm gonna say one, just respond, and then we'll go through. There's four things that I want to say here that I've listed out. Something you're working through right now.

SPEAKER_00 23:45

Purpose. Purpose for myself, my gifts, and how to allow that to shine truly without fear of being seen, fear of success and judgment because I feel that I'm getting myself into a space where I'm wanting more and also feeling like crap. Does that mean I'm gonna be doing more? But realizing also expansion doesn't mean one doing it alone, and it doesn't also mean time equals growth. It can also mean efficiency equals growth. Systems and like purpose there can lead something farther. It's not always a direct exchange, so I don't have to go to past feelings of burnout and have that be an old wound that stops me from moving forward into an area of development that I want to.

SPEAKER_01 24:49

Okay. A decision you've been putting off.

SPEAKER_00 24:55

Launching my own personal coaching program. But it's coming.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

How long have you been thinking about that?

SPEAKER_00 25:04

Um a while. But really has come to the forefront over the last five sixty days.

SPEAKER_01 25:14

Okay. When when should we uh look out for it?

SPEAKER_00 25:18

Probably you'll see evidence of it in the over the next couple weeks.

SPEAKER_01 25:24

You're gonna kind of trickle it out.

SPEAKER_00 25:26

Yeah. And it's small, it's intimate. Like it can only accept three people at a time. So it's not gonna be this whole big thing. And I am really excited about it. But yes, it's taken me a while to say, oh, okay, now I can step into this. And I can really execute on this now.

SPEAKER_01 25:43

I'm excited for you. I think it's gonna not just make an impact on the people that you're helping, but I think it's gonna be good for you too. Um Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:52

Yes, I mean you know it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:57

What's something in your business that still feels messy?

SPEAKER_00 26:07

Accountability. Accountability. I mean being strong enough to really mark accountability in the moment versus waiting for multiple examples of it and then giving the multiple examples versus saying, this was the first example and the first violation, we're gonna address this right now, so that I don't have to wait and then have resent come up because it's not being done in a certain way in the time frame I want it.

SPEAKER_01 26:36

That's a tough one because I think that there's a fine line there too, because you almost don't want to feel like you're nitpicking either. It's like, when do I say something and when do I don't? Do I say something about this one thing? Or should I kind of just let that go to see if it actually happens again? And there's there's a science to it. There's a science to it. And I think every business owner, leader, whatever, um, will learn what that looks like for them if they keep their eyes and their heart peeled, honestly. Yeah. I don't think it's a one size fits all.

SPEAKER_00 27:11

And inviting my like team lead to come into that space with me too. Be like, are you noticing this? How come you haven't said anything? Right. So, like, you have this authority. Why are you held holding back too? So it's a lesson in leadership for both of us, me holding her account to help her hold account to others too.

SPEAKER_01 27:31

Yeah. Finally, I'll ask you this. What's one thing you've changed your mind on recently?

SPEAKER_00 27:43

That I have to know everything from A to Z before executing on a decision.

SPEAKER_01 27:49

That's a big one.

SPEAKER_00 27:50

It's the control, right? It's the fear of the unknown and the feeling like, well, I need to be prepared with answers or a plan to every which way it could go, versus just taking the leap and taking the jump because that's what feels good at the moment and feels purposeful.

SPEAKER_01 28:06

Yeah. Dr. Marisa, this this is one of those conversations where, like, if I don't know. Well, I don't care if you're building something or whatever. I just this is it hit home. It hit home for me. So um I felt this one. I think all you guys out there felt this one too. So, Dr. Marisa, I really appreciate you uh coming back and kind of sharing your heart with us here today.

SPEAKER_00 28:30

Thank you for providing the space to be able to do that and for providing this resource out there for the community to be able to listen and also participate in conversations like this and have that inspire something in them to again have a fuller expression of their lives.

SPEAKER_01 28:48

That is the hope. That is the hope. I think we're gonna start having different types of guests on the show too, where it's like, hey, let's talk about mental health.

unknown 29:00

Right?

SPEAKER_01 29:04

I mean, so I mean, my my wife actually is uh she's a Christian counselor as well. She she graduated last year. It's it's been kind of cool watching her walk through that. But um, I'm like, you know, this isn't a coincidence. This isn't a coincidence. So I think I think we might start walking down that path to see, you know, let's have that conversation. Let's see what makes us but I love that. Anyway, thanks again, Dr. Marisa. Really appreciate your time.

SPEAKER_00 29:31

Thank you, I mean, thank you so much. It's been a pleasure.

SPEAKER_01 29:37

That wraps up part two with Dr. Marisa. And honestly, this one hit home. We talked about the heartwork podcast and heartwork, self-worth, leadership, uh, purpose, accountability. What else? Oh, and the real cost of building something that matters. One of the biggest takeaways for me, at least, was this idea that building something meaningful does take from you. That's the truth. But it can also give back to you when you stay connected to the why behind it. So profound. And I love the honesty behind purpose, launching something new, messy, uh, accountability, and realizing you don't need to know A to Z before making a decision. Sometimes you just need enough clarity to take the next step. Dr. Marisa, thank you again for coming back and being willing to have the kind of conversation that just doesn't fit neatly into a reel, but absolutely needs to be heard. To everyone watching or listening, thank you for being here. If this episode encouraged you, challenged you, or made you feel slightly called out in a loving way, share it with somebody who needs it. This has been Beyond Adjustments. I'm Amin Saeed, and we'll see you in the next one.